A year ago today I was sitting in Jessie Grace's living room on her sofa after spending 14 hours at the hospital in a small waiting room with close friends and family. In the next room lying unconscious, hooked up to dozens of machines was my best friend Elizabeth Ruth Jobes.
She had been that way for nine hours and would remain so for a further 11 hours.
Jessie Grace, Lizzie and I had been best friends since the day I was born (as I was the last of the three to enter this world). We grew up together and went through every stage of our lives to gather, in short they were my other two sisters.
We played together, schooled together, grew into women together. We giggle shyly about our current crushes and cried on each others shoulders when we were down. They were and still are my best friends.
This is me and Lizzie, at a guess we are six or seven maybe, on holiday in Scotland. We look like tramps here but I swear we weren't!
Lizzie's 8th birthday party. You can't see too well from this angle but her birthday cake had an actual Barbie doll on top!
Fire fighter Lizzie! She was always helping people.
She always was a lil' cutie pie.
Posing on the HMS Trincomalee in Hartlepool,
Me and Lizzie having a very serious stick sword fight in a random forest in Scotland 2007.
Again in Scotland 2008.
Being that close it was very upsetting when circumstances beyond anyone's control separated me from my friends but thankfully we were reunited in July of 2011.
This without a doubt was one of the happiest days of my life EVER!
I could never have imagined then that only four months later we would be in the waiting room of the hospital praying for Lizzie to get better.
Two days before Lizzie was rushed to hospital she went to the doctors complaining of feeling ill. They told her she had a bout of the common cold and that all she needed was to rest. And rest she did until the early hours of the morning on the 26th of October when she stumbled out of bed, delirious, with a raging temperature and collapsed on the stairs.
We were at the hospital for 14 hours but by 3:20am the following morning Lizzie, my best Friend, my sister, sadly died.
At the time it wasn't clear what she had died of but we later found out that it was a Streptococcal infection that could have been prevented if the doctors had not of misdiagnosed her on the Monday.
I think that is what hurts the most, the fact that she should be here.
I took this picture the day we met back up, it has now become Lizzie's image.
One of many modelling photos taken by the very talented Chirs Patterson.
Another modelling shot by Chris Patterson
And possibly one of my favourite photos of all time, Lizzie at a friends wedding on the Sunday before she died. Even though she was ill she shouldn't miss it.
Lizzie, I miss you everyday. I have not come to terms with your death and I don't think I ever will. I'll spend the rest of my life wondering why you are not here, why you won't get married and have kids or experience any of life's natural progressions. I'll spend the rest of my life missing you and crying on a night before I go to bed because I haven't been able to text you, or ring you or see one of your ststus' on facebook or go to the movies with you or just have that coffee we were meant to have when you were better.
I will feel a terrible moment of panic whenever I hear a Kings of Leon song or a Simon and Garfunkel song because it will remind me that you are never coming back.
I wish you were here, I wish I didn't have to write this but shit happens I suppose eh?
Love you loads precious.
Laura Lou x
